Falling In Love
” What if you simply devoted this year to loving yourself more? ”
I’d like to talk about self-love today.
So many people today talk about loving yourself, but what does that even mean? It means many things to different people but here’s my take on it:
💙Is it about paying attention to your needs? You bet it is!
I went through a rough patch some years ago and life was hard for me then. I felt unhappy, I felt stuck, I did not know how to get out of that pickle, I felt very tired a lot of the time, life sucks, I thought. But I really wanted out of that pickle, so I kept on driving myself to find a way out. Let me tell you, it was exhausting. I was so tired! like never before! Even though I slept good hours every night, I would wake up tired. I figured I was run down or something, so I went to see my doctor and we did some blood test to see if my body is low on vitamins or minerals. My body was fine! Yet I was tired, constantly! And I said it all time ” I am so tired” “oh, I am so tired!” Every time I came up with a solution to come out of that pickle I was in, I would feel this big wave a tiredness come over me. This went on for months!
One day I was meeting up with my coach at the time. We said hello, we sat down and started to talk. How’s it going, she asks casually. “Oh, I am so tired”, I say. “I could just lay down and sleep a million years!”
And just than, I actually really heard myself for the first time saying it. I’ve been saying it a lot but you see, I could not hear it, I could not hear my soul screaming at me, screaming to stop driving myself like a slave driver to come out of my pickle!
It was one of those a-ha moments! I suddenly could see how unkind and unloving I was being towards myself!
The first thing I did after our meeting ended was to go home and lay down, and rest, and give myself a bit of slack first time in months!
I decided that day that from then on, I will treat myself only with love, kindness and respect. If I don’t treat myself like that how can I treat others like that? If I don’t treat myself first like that how can I expect others to treat me like that? I promised myself then that I would always listen carefully to my body. You see all that tiredness – my body was trying to tell me that I need to stop and change course.
💙Is self love about being inconsiderate about others? Is self love about boosting your ego? Is self love about comparing yourself to others? Absolutely not!
Self love is about knowing yourself and making sure that you take care of what your body and soul needs, so that from that place you can create healthy relationships with other people and the world around you. Self love is about creating a loving relationship with yourself first, a respectful relationship with yourself, a joyful relationship with yourself.
When you love yourself your relationship with everything changes! It will inform every decision you make, it will inform the life you wish to lead, the people you spend time with, the jobs you choose, the food you eat, the clothes you wear, how you treat other people, where you put your energy!
I have an invitation for you:
Go sit or stand in front of the mirror in your house for five minutes. Simply look at yourself and hold eye contact. Look deep into your own eyes and let yourself see yourself… maybe for the first time… take in every detail of your face… no judgement! If judgment comes, just let it gently slip away, pay no heed to it. Look at yourself with childlike curiosity, gaze into your own eyes lovingly… get lost into your unique, superb self.
Feeling weird? I bet you do! Feeling like this is insane? Yep, that’s natural too. If you are not used to doing this practice, yes, it will feel weird and wrong and strange at the beginning. But it is a practice, and like every practice the more you do it the more you’ll feel at home with it.
I’ve been doing this practice for years now, mirror work is a beautiful practice that I learned from the incredible Louise Hay and it changed my life, it absolutely revolutionised my own relationship with myself. I do it most days first thing in the morning. I am so excited that I got to know myself in this new way!
I invite you to try this today and tell me how you feel. It’s ok to feel emotional, let yourself feel whatever is coming up, it is a healing process.
As Louise Hay writes in her book “Mirror Work”:
“The mirror reflects back to you the feelings you have about yourself. It makes you immediately aware of where you are resisting and where you are open and flowing. It clearly shows you what thoughts you will need to change if you want to have a joyous, fulfilling life.”
Be your best friend! Be your best lover! Be your best parent! Be your best fan!